Q: What did the blonde say about blonde jokes?

A: She said they were pretty good, but they might offend some Puerto Ricans.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who hijacked a submarine?

A: She demanded $200,000 and a parachute.

Q: How do you recognize a blonde in school?

A: They are the only ones who erase their notebook when the teacher erases the board.

Q: How do you sink a submarine full of blonde's?

A: Knock on the hatch.

Q. How do you know a blonde has been using a dishwasher?

A.It's cloged up with paper plates.

Q.How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb?

A. 3. 1 to find the bulb, 1 to find a ladder and 1 to find a man.

Q: How many blonde jokes are there?

A: One - the rest are all true.

Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a dead skunk on the road?

A: The skunk has skid marks in front of it.

Q. How many blonde's does it take to change a light bulb?

A. Who knows it has never been done.

Q. How do you know a blonde has been using the computer?

A. There is cheese in front of the mouse.

Q. Why did the blonde bury her walkman?

A. Because the batteries were dead.

Q: How can you tell if a cat is blonde?

A: No matter what height you drop it from it always lands on its head.

Q: Why did the blonde get fired from the banana plantation?

A: Because she threw out all the bent ones.

Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets?

A: She went looking for the three guys.

Q: Why did the blonde sell her car?

A: To get gas money.

Q: What do you call a blonde in a leather jacket?

A: Married.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde is high?

A: You can't.

Q: Why did the blonde pee on the floor?

A: Because the sign said "Wet Floor."

Q: How did the blonde kill her toy poodle?

A: Trying to put batteries in it.

Q: What do you call it when a blonde gets taken over by a demon?

A: A vacant possession.

Q: Why do blondes occupy about 90% of the net bandwidth?

A: Because they keep accidentally deleting their copies of the blonde joke list.

Q: What do you call blonde twins doing bubble gum commercials?

A: Double-dumb.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde has been using your lawnmower?

A: The green WELCOME mat is ripped to shreds.

Q: How can you tell which tricycle belongs to the blonde?

A: It is the one with the kickstand.

Q: Where do you look for blonde's obituaries?

A: Under "Home Improvements."

Q: Why did it take the blonde a whole week to wash three basement windows?

A: It took her six days just to dig the holes to put the ladder in.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who gave her cat a bath?

A: She still hasn't gotten all the hair off her tongue.

Q: How does a psychic refer to a blonde?

A: Light reading.

Q: Why did the blonde only smell good on the right side?

A: She didn't know where to buy Left Guard!

Q: Why couldn't the blonde guy bob for apples?

A: His sister was using the toilet.

Q: What does a postcard from a blonde's vacation say?

A: Having a wonderful time. Where am I?

Q: How does a blonde hemophiliac treat herself?

A: Acupuncture.

Q: What's a blonde's favorite color?

A: A light shade of clear.

Q: Hear about the blonde explorer?

A: She bought a piece of sandpaper thinking it was a map of the Sahara Desert.

Q: What do a group of blonde's have in common?

A: Nothing they can think of.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?

A: You don't have to. They're born that way.

Q: How do you confuse a blonde?

A: Put her in a round room and tell her to sit in the corner.

Q: How does she confuse you back?

A: She comes out and says she did.

Q: What do you call a blonde CPA?

A: An impostor.

Q: Why did the blonde who stay up all night studying?

A: She had a urine test the next day.

Q: Did you hear about that blonde that was an M.D.?

A: Yes, Mentally Deficient.

Q: A blonde, brunette, and redhead are in kindergarten; which one is the sexiest?

A: The blonde, because she is the only one that's 18.

Q: How do you drown a blonde?

A: When he asks for a lifesaver, ask him what flavor he wants.

Q: How do you recognize a blonde at a car wash?

A: She's the one on her bike.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde that almost caused a car accident?

A: The spare tire in her trunk blew out.

Q: Why didn't the blondes go to the movies on one buck night?

A: They couldn't fit a deer into the car.

Q: What do you call a brunette in between two blonde's?

A: An interpreter in need of an immediate rescue.

Q: What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?

A: A mental block.

Q: Why did the blonde dye her hair brunette?

A: She thought it would help her get a higher score on the SAT.

Q: What did the blonde do when her doctor told her she had sugar in her urine?

A: She peed on her corn flakes.

Q: Why don't blondes like buttered toast?

A: They can't figure out which side the butter goes on.

Q: Why did the blonde keep a empty carton of milk in the fridge?

A: In case she wanted black coffee.

Q: What did the blonde get on her I.Q. test?

A: Drool.

Q: Why was the blonde housewife mad at her husband?

A: He was out shooting craps and she didn't know how to cook them.

Q: How do you keep a blonde in suspense?

A: Give her a mirror and tell her to wait for the other person to say 'hi.'

Q: Why do blondes shower for hours?

A: The shampoo bottle says, "Lather, rinse, and repeat."

Q: Why did the blonde take two hits of acid?

A: She wanted to go on a round trip.

Q: How can you tell if a blonde is a natural blonde?

A: Blow in her ear, if she's a natural blonde she starts to float.

Q: What do you call a blonde with brain damage?

A: Normal.

Q: What do you call blonde brain cells?

A: On loan.

Q: Why are blonde's immune to Mad Cow Disease?

A: It only affects the brain.

Q: Why did the blonde make love in the microwave?

A: She wanted to have a baby in 9 minutes.

Q: Why did the blonde have a hysterectomy?

A: She wanted to stop having grandchildren.

Q: What does a blonde say when you asked her what the last two words of the national anthem are?

A: Play ball.

Q: How are blondes and parking spaces alike?

A: All the good ones are taken and the ones that are left are handicapped.

Q: What happens, when a blonde emigrates from europe to america?

A: The average IQ increases on both continents!

Q: What do you call 4 blondes in 4 seperate cars at a 4 way stop?
A: An eternity.

Q: What do you call a blonde with a runny nose?

A: Full.

Q: How does the blonde car pool work?

A: They all meet at work at 7:45

Q: Why can't blondes make ice cubes?

A: They always forget the recipe.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde whose boyfriend said he loved her?

A: She believed him.

Q: Did you hear about the new form of birth control for blondes?

A: They take off their makeup.

Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs?

A: She fell out of the tree.

Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed?

A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.

Q: What do you call a blonde with half a brain?

A: Gifted.

Q: How do blonde braincells die?

A: Alone.

Q: What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?

A: Pregnant.

Q: What happened to the blonde tap dancer?

A: She slipped off and fell down the drain.

Q How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?

A: There's white-out on the screen.

Q: How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer?

A: There's writing on the white-out.

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